oh man the best is when a dude is like "you’re not wife material." fucking good. i want to be totalitarian dictator material; blood sucking life ruiner material; fucking bulletproof immortal drug lord material. not your fucking wife you gross asshole. 


so apparently “normal” people sleep in the pm hours and wake up in the am hours???


If only I was given a dollar for every time I made myself look stupid in front of a cute person